Gratitude Instead of Entitlement

I must confess that the hardest thing to overlook in a person is our sense of self-entitlement and pride. I think there is nothing more repulsive and disgusting than a person who just sucks everything from everyone around them, and then feels that it is owed to them anyway. I see this come up in my children at times, and I feel this is one of the biggest challenges we face as parents. To destroy the sense of self-entitlement while re-assuring them that they are deeply loved and valued is so important. NOBODY owes us ANYTHING!! If someone takes the time to do the smallest thing for us, we should be thankful. What lies in our flesh is absolutely repulsive, and all the world around us feeds into it. The root cause of everything that has ever gone wrong in our lives is DIRECTLY caused by selfishness. Let us guard against it, but more importantly let us teach our children to know gratitude and be thankful.

To Be Head of Your Household

If you are facing difficult times in your marriage right, are going through a divorce, or are divorced I want you to take something to heart. If you have children, then do not take lightly how loudly your actions are speaking to them as you endure these difficult times. We can justify whatever we want, but it does not change the truth. For us men... Well, I will just talk first hand so that maybe it is easier to see looking at another person's life. I know that right now my daughter is watching her daddy. She is learning from me how a man should treat her. She is learning from me what commitment, or lack there of, looks like. She is learning whether God truly makes a difference, and she is learning about love and family. My son too is watching me. He is learning all the same, but for him I am teaching him how to love his wife and family. The choices and actions I take as relevant to my family will have a far reaching impact for generations. This being said... Consider carefully the choices you are making. I want my daughter to appreciate and expect her husband to be committed and fight for his family. I want my son to know what a husband loving his wife as Jesus loves the Church looks like. I refuse to pass along chains to my children, but am willing to set the bar and break those chains. I want the best for them. This is not all about you or me, and LOVE IS A CHOICE. You can CHOOSE to love, you have to. We must see more than ourselves in every situation.

Purpose

I share what I share because my privacy is of no great relevance. I do not seek affirmation or honor from men, but rather from God. I know that I am not alone in my struggles, and I know that by sharing what I have been given it may help someone else who is enduring similar situations. My only intent is to share what God has placed on my heart, and the details are His to figure out. If you hear something in my words, it has nothing to do with me. It has everything to do with you and God. As a servant of the one true King, my obligation is to obey. I trust Him with everything I am, so I submit to His will. I know it is easy for people to read the things I write, post, or support, and then to pass judgment on me. So be it. God knows my heart. The things I share may not be for that person. However, the person whom God intended to reach will be reached. This is why I do what I do. This is why I am who I am. I desire the best for each person God has placed in my circle of influence. If I kept my mouth shut about the greatest news in the all of creation, how much could I really care about any one of you?

Isaiah 55:11
“So shall My word be that goes forth from My mouth;
It shall not return to Me void,
But it shall accomplish what I please,
And it shall prosper in the thing for which I sent it.”

Check Your Self

Here is another huge indicator of our maturity, or lack thereof. Have you ever gotten mad at someone because they don't do something the way you would? Putting the toilet paper on the roller thingy... Squeezing toothpaste out of the tube... Mowing the yard... Thinking and processing... Maybe they don't go as fast as you might like them to... These are all indicators that we think more highly of our self, and that we are judging the other person based on our standard of us being supreme. One that is mature will be more patient and understanding, knowing that we are all different. Examine yourself.

To Be a Father and Husband

There is something God has written on my heart with great conviction. It is what His love is supposed to look like in our lives. We all have people in our lives that we love, and we love them the best that we can. In my life I came to terms with the reality that the best love I had to give to those I cared most about was not enough. What is on the inside always comes out, no matter how diligently we strive to make things different. I was a selfish boy who cared more for me than for those I loved. It was that selfishness that corrupted the love I sought to give. What came out was the best I had to give, but it was really all about me.

It was this truth that God used to bring me to Himself. I didn’t want to hurt anyone anymore. I didn’t want to hurt my wife. I didn’t want to hurt my kids. The turning of my heart was a moment when I cried out to God with complete sincerity to just make me the man my wife and kids needed me to be. I didn’t ask Him to help me. I didn’t ask Him to make things better for me. I asked Him to do whatever it took for me to be the man they needed me to be. This was the beginning of my new life.

God showed me that the only way I could love my family the way they need to be loved is if I would lay down my life. I had to die so that they could live. I had to take up my cross so that I could love them the way they need to be loved. I realized that only through defeating selfishness could I give of myself in such a manner that my love would be genuinely felt by the recipient.

It is the love that God showed me when He suffered the crucifixion that has changed my life. While I was still in rebellion against Him, living selfishly for myself and hurting the people around me, He still loved me. He pursued me in spite of myself, and never gave up on me. It is this love, unconditional and sacrificial, that I wanted to be able to give to my family. By yielding to God, He has shown me what love is supposed to look like. After all, God is love.

I cannot say that I know much, but I can say that I know God. I know love for the first time in my life. Because I know love, I know hope. Without God I am nothing but a selfish vacuum where my best is short of ever being what I would want it to be. With God, it is Him working through me. He can and will do what I cannot. Love is sacrifice. Love is everything, and without love there is nothing. I am bound to what God has shown me. Though the doubts and fears come, God always moves to keep me on track. He is faithful even when I am not.

Wrap Your Mind Around This.

Around 33 A.D. the Sanhedrin and Pharisees were the authoritative power in the city of Jerusalem. Something like the Ada county prosecutors and judicial system here where we live. When Jesus was arrested in the garden of Gethsemane, it was done under direct order of the Sanhedrin and Pharisees. This would be as if the judges and prosecutors got together and issued a warrant for your arrest. This warrant was not issued for any criminal act, but rather for the fact that he declared himself to be equal with God.

 

When he was arrested, every single one of those who were with him ran for their lives. Nobody wants to die after all, and the threat on their lives had been real and perpetuated over the previous year or so. The proceeding torture, public humiliation, public beating, and public crucifixion were witnessed by the entire city. (Jesus was kind of a big deal at the time.) There was no doubt about how those in authority felt about Jesus, his doctrine, and those who followed him. All of his followers hid for fear of their lives.

 

Then all of a sudden you have men, knowing full well what awaited them if they even acknowledged that they were followers of Jesus, publicly speaking and teaching in the very name of Jesus. These men were preaching that Jesus is the Son of God, knowing that they would die for such a declaration. Now think about this!! Why would ANY sane person do something so blatant and open, knowing that it would cost them their reputation and ultimately their very life!? Churches were springing up out of the wood work at an exponential pace. Even if you don’t want to read the Bible, these facts are recorded in history.

 

The ONLY thing that makes this phenomenon make any sense is that something had to have happened after Jesus was crucified. Something happened that turned these scared men into fearless speakers. The Bible records this event clearly, and was written at a time when there were eyewitnesses still alive to testify to the event. JESUS WAS RAISED FROM THE DEAD!! He appeared, in person, to many of his believers. In one instance it was recorded that he appeared to over 500 people at one time!

 

Think about it. If these men saw Jesus face to face, (in body, not a vision), then no wonder they began to be fearless of death. They knew that what Jesus preached was true, and they saw first hand that God is faithful even after death. They KNEW that God would raise them too! They didn’t think it. They didn’t speculate about it. They SAW it! There is no other explanation for the boldness and growth of the church under such hostile conditions. If they hadn’t SEEN Jesus with their own eyes, then why die for a dead man and his lost cause? People don’t stand for lost causes after the battle is already lost. Why throw your life away? Their cause was simply made real by the appearance of Jesus. In KNOWING that you win would you not fight to the end, regardless of the risks? I know I would… I DO.

Tough Questions, Great Opportunities

My son and I were talking, and he was telling me how he felt about homosexuality. He said "I know God doesn't like it, but I want to respect other people and let them do what they want, so I support it." This was a huge opportunity to pour into my son's life. I told him that it doesn't matter what we think. That is what is wrong with the world today. Nobody wants to offend anyone, so nobody holds to any convictions.

I told Hayden like this. Simple truth, simple application. Jesus says if you are not for me, then you are against me. Period. His entire ministry He drew lines. He said "You are here, and you need to be here. If you stay where you are at, you will perish in your sin and you stand under the wrath of God. If you come to me, you will have eternal life and peace now."

The world does not apply rules of logic to their line of thinking. You cannot say you are a Christian, yet approve of things that God hates. It is impossible. I told Hayden that he is going to have to choose a side. Either we are for God, or we are against Him. Period. Then I also shared what Jesus said to His disciples. He said “They hated me, they will hate you also.” I let my son know that to stand for God is to stand against the thing of this world. I told him that if he chooses to obey God and follow Christ, the world will hate him for it. It takes great courage and strength to follow the Lord.

I did not have to specifically address homosexuality. I addressed it at the core issue. If God says it is bad, and to not do it, then it is bad and a person should not do it. Homosexuality is listed in the same list as coveting, which is simply wanting what we do not have. A sin is a sin, is a sin. To approve of one is to approve of them all. I told him that if he chooses to give his life to Christ, it no longer matters what he thinks about things, only what God thinks about them. He will have to make that choice on his own, but I will not let him think it is something other than what it is. There is NO FENCE. We have to make a choice, and be ALL IN. Period.